The Desire for God is Greater than My Desire for a Child

husband and wife on their front porch

When I think of our testimony I am filled with gratitude for what the Father has done for my husband Chris and I. I come from a broken home and considered myself broken for most of my life. My husband came from a Christian home but fell into years of drug addiction due to a very strict household. He had to overcome traumas from his deployments in the military, a divorce and heavy drug use. Thankfully when we met we were in a new place of being on fire for Christ. We got married just over a year later.

We have now been married nearly 6 1/2 years now and most of the time has been spent tracking my cycle, getting tested, receiving treatment and now being in a place of surrender. The biggest thing I have learned through this journey is that my ultimate desire is for the Father and that desire needs to stay greater than my desire for a child. I was once asked to give my testimony at my church and my first response was, “but I don’t have my miracle child yet.” As I reflect on it today I know that the biggest part of my testimony is the building of faith in mine and my husband’s hearts.

I am not sad for what we have been through in our lives before we met because I am thankful for the restoration and thankful for the growth. We are here because of God and we seek to bring Him glory through our story. We now carry and build on that faith as we are in this season of waiting. We have not seen our miracle baby yet but we have seen miracles and we know the miracle maker!

I am also so thankful for Moms in the Making and have been following this group for around four years now. I am forever grateful for the support and encouragement I have received from Caroline and all of the ladies I have met through the group! I have been to all three of the life changing conferences. If you have a chance to go… GO!!! I decided a year ago to take the step in leading a group in my home. It was a big step of faith considering we had just made a huge move and knew very little people in my area. Not long after applying I found out someone in my little town had just reach out to MITM for prayer after going through infertility and a miscarriage. Since then God has continued to work in Pitman, New Jersey through Moms in the Making and for that, I am so grateful!

Rian Shaw – Pitman, New Jersey

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